Will you guys leave me and never return if 98% of my recipes include oats? And a food processor? WAAAAIT don't leave this recipe doesn't need a food processor.
But I do love that little machine.
I also seriously love oats. I have a lot of seriously love foods. My grocery cart is pretty much identical ever trip to the grocery store. So I find ways to mix 'n match and PBJ the stuff up to keep things fresh.
I recently wrote an article for the local newspaper and since it was early July at the time, obviously back to school is the topic (WHY DO WE DO THAT TO KIDS). I included a recipe along with the article and right after hitting send I thought NO...PBJ. Nothing is more BTS than PBJ. Missed my chance to include a PBJ recipe in that article, but luckily I've got this little space to share it.
I've started making granola in a new, groundbreaking way. Groundbreaking is for sure a strong word to use when discussing granola, but I'm gonna stand with it for a minute. I had to come up with this groundbreaking method because I almost always bake granola too long which results in some nerrrrsty tasting nuts. Burnt nut flavor = oreos dipped in orange juice, pretty much a granola ruiner. Not to mention over baking basically leaves you with individual granola flakes that you have to carefully maneuver into your bowl with tweezers OR spill all over the counter (I would be an awesome infomercial actress).
NEW GRANOLA METHOD: toast the oats first....naked (see below for personal story involving the word naked). While naked oats are toasting, mix together wet ingredients AND THEN toss toasted oats in them! (pauses for applause). Result = chewy granola clusters. If clustery granola isn't your thing then I dunno why you have listened to this rant for as long as you have and I'm sorry.
Time for a personal story related to the word naked. For my sister's bridal shower, I was trying to think of a clever ass way of saying in the invite "if you are so kind as to bring a gift, please don't wrap it" for environmental reasons and also then everyone could see the gift right there out in the open. I stayed up until 3 AM trying to incorporate the words "naked" or "nude" into that little diddy cause I just GOTTA be funny (get it?? Like naked gift? Bring your gift in the nude??) and it did not work. I was afraid people were going to think they were supposed to present their gift whilst being nude. Anyway, to avoid the nudity confusion, I came up with a confusing, non-rhyming rhyme (THE WORST KIND OF RHYME) instead and a bunch of people texted me asking what the hell I was trying to say. SUCH a fail. But funny, and I blamed it on my precious babies who suck up so much brain space.
If you're the meal preppin' type, add this to your list this weekend. And drizzle some PBJ on top cause YOU DESERVE IT.